Saturday, July 12, 2008

Creative Challenge # 10 Phrase is "Etched in My Mind."

Etched in My Mind for All Time

 

 

Etched in my mind

You were 'one of a kind'

That phrase now kills

As my emotion it spills

From the depth of despair

What a hopeless affair

 

I was warned of your charm

And thought nought of harm

When you swept me away

With that haughty display

Of high minded intelligence

And obvious independence

 

I was smitten and taken in

Yes! you can call it a sin

To be so all consumed, by

No ordinary guy

From the very start

You captured my heart

 

I was at your beck and call

Not even a fall

Could lesson your grip

I considered a whip

But alas I could not

Best to leave you to trot

 

Rather than hold you in reign

Because all was in vane

You had a mind of your own

More wild oats to be sown

I was just your money tree

You had no thought for me

 

 

It was a fateful rainy day

As I remember well that May

Breaking down the door

As the thunder started to roar

Unusual for you to race

          From your secure and cosy space

 

I found you many hours later

But you were no traitor

As you lay down in your peace

I knew I had to release

The bond I had felt and I so bereft

Because I was now left

 

By you my gallant steed

I loved you true, indeed

A stake through your hoof it was dire

You went down in that quagmire

That sight forever, etched in my mind

I will always love you, my 'one of a kind'.

 

Milli 2008-07-12

 

 

Based on a True Story and In memory of a friend’s beautiful horse who accidently died when a broken toy, which was left in the horse paddock, became a stake piercing the hoof and a main blood vessel, of this great animal's foot.

Consequently it died from blood loss before being found. Sorry this was a sad one this week.

 

 Take the tour from here.

28 comments:

  1. Wow. Great meaningful poem, though sad one. Thank you for sharing. Please see mine at - http://jayaramanms.multiply.com/journal/item/227

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  2. You have wriiten a tribute of love for your dear horse. It is sooo sad, it made me cry.

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  3. Sylvie dear it was not my own horse however I felt much empathy for the lady whose horse it was. You know horses command from their owners because they are such proud beasts and those pony girls and boys just adore their charges. Thanks so much for your very sweet and heartfelt comment. Hugs from Milli.

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  4. Thank You too JR and your post was wonderful.

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  5. It is sad. I was enthralled the whole way through and in the end was amazed it was a horse. What a woeful thing to happen. This is wonderful Milli.

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  6. you always amaze me and the best part it's never predictable!
    another great write from you...love your style

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  7. Thanks Ronnie I must admit to holding the suspense for as long as I could with innuendo before announcing that it was a Horse.

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  8. Danette unpredictable I hope is good?
    Thank you for your encouraging comment.

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  9. First I thought it was a lover and to find it was a horse filled me with grief as the eyes of a horse looks into one's soul. He wasn't your horse but he had looked at you, imparted his message and with it his trust. I repeat, you get to me Milli.

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  10. that is a suspenseful poem, I would never had thought it was a horse...great one...take care and god bless.

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  11. I wouldn't have thought it was about a horse either. You wrote this very well.... so sorry that it was inspired by the loss of that poor horse though.

    http://rmgrant.multiply.com/journal/item/147/CC_10_Etched_in_my_mind

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  12. you wrote a very dynamic piece. I was so engrossed. Most excellent. What a great writer you are.. kudos. ZeeZee

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  13. This is such a touching narration.. For a while I thought it was a haughty lover. Until on the word "steed" did my eyes hover. The lose of a beloved steed, In the heart leaves a painful seed. I hope your friend is feeling better now, As her heart heals, with another Horse's Love.

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  14. Oh my word! What a horrible way to die!

    It didn't sound like a horse until the end. Reminds me of a novella by D.H. lawrence called St. Maur.

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  15. Wow, I think at first it was a love lost, and then realized it WAS love lost,...just a different kind of live. Good going.

    http://vickiecollins.multiply.com/journal/item/400

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  16. I'm in tears here I'm at a true loss for words....beautifully written

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  17. beautifully written darlin...........beautiful.........................

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  18. Got me too. I'm sorry for the horse. Does this make me a bad person? If it was a cheating lover not sure I'd have the same feelings as I do the horse.

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  19. heck no Friggincrazy. Not at all. I wrote about the bond felt between a horse lover and how the horse reciprocates. As i said earlier I used innuendo in the beginning because it can be like a love affair between the horse owner and their steed.

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  20. What you said here Bill touched my heart.

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  21. Tina the poem does have suspense and i thank you for your visit.

    Grant I am very glad that you enjoyed the poem. Sad it is indeed.

    Zee Zee and you write an inspiring comment too.

    Thanks Rashmi for your wonderful touch here too and maybe another horse who knows.

    Kittigory I wi need to read St Maur.

    Thanks Vickie so very much.

    Barb how wonderful that you found my poem this way. Fantastic.

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  22. Toni and Peter you are both wonderful and I thank you both dearly.

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  23. I also thought of a partnership that was not to be, and it was but not the "human" kind. Very moving poem and when you know the truth behind it all, it hurts even more. Beautiful ode to the memory of the horse.
    http://tabbynera.multiply.com/journal/item/685/Creative_Challenge_10_-_Etched_in_my_62_year_old_mind

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  24. Loved the semblance here, the rhyming was near perfect and the tribute excellant. I knew early on what this would be about (a horse that is), but not the horse's subsequent ending. Terribly sad for this to have had happen.

    http://danceinsilence.multiply.com/journal/item/408

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  25. oh, for a moment i thought it was a tragic love story between man and woman. i became so engrossed with the sorrow .... great poem!

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  26. Brilliant it is, sadness with love and memory.

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  27. I wish to thank everyone who stopped by to either comment or read my entry here. Not an easy read or for that matter an easy write. let's see what the next challenge presents us with?

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