Let's have a good laugh with a blast from the past?

Let's Have a good laugh with a blast from the past? I found a gem in the pile.

At times the book case can look a little unloved and over crowded and I am one who has a stack of books that just get popped into a box and put into the shed until I think more about whether or not to read them again give them away or swap or sell them off.

The collection is not that large and recently I thought I would recycle a few books back into circulation either for a reread or for a sort through. I had a stack of these books on a coffee table and had noticed a few friends picking up one in particular between conversations and quickly glancing through it with a smile on their face.

Today I chanced to pick up this antique book. An older paper back circa 1979 or there abouts as I can not find a date however the book is getting that yellowing tinge to the pages so I suspect its been around for sometime..

The title is The Book of Heroic Failures written by Stephen Pile. I read through some of the chapters and now I know why my friends were having a silent laugh in between conversation as the book is a riot to read. So, so funny and the stories still relevant today. In fact I looked the book up on the net and found more about it. In the back there is a membership application form for NTGCGB and what do you think that stands for? Let me enlighten you all here.

The Not Terribly Good Club of Great Britain club was started by Stephen Pile in order to bring together people of notable ineptitude so that they could share common experiences of failure. The club had a handbook, The Book of Heroic Failures , which became a best-seller. The book had a form for readers to fill in and send to an address; however, after receiving 30,000 applications, Pile closed the club, declaring it a "failure as a failure".

LOL now that just gives you an idea of the commitment this author had for his club.

There is a site on the net that has some stories taken from the book and you can read some of the stories from this page and contribute also if you would like to..

click here Heroic

I will give here a few stories from the book for a good belly laugh and I thought if you can think of any of your own failures to share with us all, then maybe you will either share here or write them on your own blog post. Remember this is a post for the seriously funny individuals who can laugh loudly at the other side of success and just remember for every successful moment in life there are bound to be a few, oh so memorable and funny Failures. Personally I love to call all those moments a lead up to the real deal, a practice run so to speak. So lets look at one story here so you can get the idea.

THE LEAST SUCCESSFUL EXHIBITION

The Royal Society for the Preventing of Accidents held an exhibition at Harrogate in 1968.
The entire display fell down.

This next one would be a latter day event

THE LEAST SUCCESSFUL RECURSIVE THERAPY FOR INTERNET ADDICTS

A group of social scientists investigated whether people can be addicted to Internet surfing or chatting in the Internet. What they have found out is not so surprising, because a similar phenomenon is well known in connection with computer games. What really surprises is the remedy and therapy proposed: they offer an Internet Chat room where those can meet each other electronically who are addicted to chatting already.

I think you are getting the idea now.

This is a story from the book.

The Least Successful Police Statement (VJ and Kannan take note here as PM's can be failures at times also.)

In 1979 a man charged with murder escaped from the custody of the Irish police. The Garda Press Office issued a statement to the effect that, "He is no more dangerous than any other murderer.".

And another for me and my friend Rita LOL

The Most Unsuccessful Cannon-Ball

On two occasions 'Miss Rita Thunderbird' has remained inside the cannon despite gunpowder encouragement to do otherwise.

She performs in a gold lame bikini and on one of these occasions ( at Battersea in 1977) Miss Thunderbird remained lodged in the cannon, while her bra was shot across the River Thames.

The Least Successful Latin Lover

In 1977 signor Paco Vila, a student from Palmero in Italy, was carried out on a stretcher,after having his cheek caressed in a discotheque. In many respects Signor Vila had the mainstream Latin interests and approach. " I am mad about big English women' he said, after regaining consciousness in a hospital bed. "But they scorn me because I lack the weight." He was on the skinny side and in a valiant effort to offset this, he started wearing thick woolly jumpers beneath his shirt.

At this particular discotheque he had so disguised his problem that he succeeded in getting an English girl on holiday at Palmero to dance with him.

During one of his more frisky rumbas, he used so much energy, that when the girl boldly stroked his cheek, he collapsed in a dead faint. when examined later by doctors, he was found to be wearing 17 woolly sweaters under his shirt and to weigh only seven stone.( Feelings of inadequency lead to desperate actions. My words used here.)

The Worst Moment for a Crime.

Choosing the right moment is vitally important in any crime. Mr David Goodall of Bamsley, for example, set off in January 1979 to do a bit of shop lifting He had hardly encountered Barnsleys British Home Stores when he was simultaneously seized by eight pairs of hands. The shop was holding a convention of store detectives at the time.

I think these few stories set the scene and this is the dedication from the author of the book.

Dedication at the forward of the book reads.

To all those who have written terrible books on how to be a success. I dedicate this terrible book on how it's perfectly all right to be incompetent for hours on end, because I am and so is everyone else I know..

Needless to say this book was a total success for the author Stephen Pile.

Milli 2007

Mr Bean/ Mona Lisa courtesty of google images.