Maya.
Survival is not always the foremost thought in a young woman's mind.
Like other young women from my home town in Gujarat India I was just beginning my journey as a new wife and expectant mother, never knowing the twist of fate about to turn my happy and fulfilled life into one of regret and sadness.
My name is Maya and my story starts well before the Earth Quake on Indian Republic Day on January 26th 2001...
I was a happy out going young girl born into a business family of Silk Merchants and Traders. I had a brother elder to me and my mother an elegant and beautiful woman wore the clothes made from the fabrics my father used for trade. She wore them in such an elegant way that we were called to attend all the social functions of the town. My father a striking and handsome man, tall and with the characteristic wide black moustache worn frequently by many of my fellow country men was a wonderful father and husband and a very important businessman.
I was always a little shy and reserved at these social gatherings, not at all like my happy out going self when with my friends in my own social environment or at school. We girls would giggle and have such wonderful fun times together and my favourite pastime was reading. I loved to read anything and everything.
My brother and I are very close we always were. He called me Didi when I was small and like all brothers he teased me so much and yet loved me with all his heart and still does. In fact it is because of him that I started to dance the Dandiya. We use Sticks in this dance, whenever we have the Navarathri Festival, which literally means nine nights. It was at these celebrations where I would watch my brother, Bhaiyya as I called him. He was an excellent dancer of the Garba also, and in this dance we use much clapping..
The way he handled the sticks for Dandiya wearing his costume, Dhoti and the Kurta top. It so much inspired me to dance as well.
So I would put on my prettiest Chaniya Choli and my full make up using the kohl around my eyes and I too would dance with him. We became well known for our participation in these dances and each festival we would dance with abandon into the night full of fun and frivolity.
It was here that my brother introduced me to his friend Bhavin I saw Bhavin many times before I would ever speak to him.
Bhaiyya had many friends and Bhavin was his friend for many years. Bhavin was a lively, handsome guy with the most mischievous grin under his big black moustache.
I knew I wanted to know him better but that would never be allowed as for me there would be a groom picked by my family one day in the not too distant future.
Bhavin was planning to study abroad in his chosen field of Medicine and I knew he had been accepted into an Australian University to complete further studies.
I pursued my career in textiles and garments and followed my father into the family business so it was with much apprehension when my family started looking to choose for me, my new husband.
My dear Bhaiyya was also involved in the process of choosing my new husband and knowing that Bhavin was coming home to find a wife after completing his studies, he had decided that he would find a way to reintroduce Bhavin into the family. I knew nothing of this scheme and when finally the day arrived for a meeting, my heart went into a total spasm, as before me I saw my brother's mischievous friend sitting there with the same handsome face and big thick moustache. I was so very, very coy and very excited at the same time, when we were formally introduced to each other. He being the ideal choice as my life partner. Of course only my Dear Bhaiyya could have pulled this miracle off.
It was a perfect wedding and all went so beautifully that I felt like all of my life dreams had all been realised in a single moment and to say that we were blissfully happy would be too simple an explanation of our union.
This now brings me to fate and the turn of events that so tragically brought all my plans into disarray. Now as you see my face it is not the once happy go lucky beauty of innocence and youth that it once reflected. I am still called an exotic beauty by those who know me, but now my persona shows the knowing of loss and great sadness. You see my happiness was short lived on that night of January 26th 2001. My handsome prince was a victim of that fateful night when the earth shook and buildings crumbled and nature again showed its force over all that we hold near and dear in our hearts.
He was only visiting his older relatives that night and intending to come home to me in our new home the very next day. His great uncle had been unwell and his mother had asked if he would visit the family and see how they all were, as he was travelling nearby that part of the town on his way home to me and the family for Republic Day Celebrations. Those few short years of our togetherness were the most wonderful years for us and now I carry his child, a child who will never know a fathers love.
Yes! As you see my painting above now shows my fragility and my inner sadness. It shows my resolve to bring my child up as my beloved Bhavin would have also chosen to do so. With all the love I can find within. Encouraging all the laughter and dancing we found so appealing in out innocence and youth. Also with the kindness and humanity my husband showed to all who ever came into contact with him in everyday life.
My Darling Bhavin, I will play out my life role and one day I will join you my loving, mischievous, handsome prince in all Love and Peacefulness.
I WILL LOVE YOU ALWAYS!!!
YOUR WIFE MAYA.
Milli 2007
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